A Sapphire Series Rookie Diary

Article by Claire Ellis - Images by Iceni Spears staff

 

So despite everything my body has been through in the last 24 hours and that I didn’t make it into bed until gone 2am, my body is still adamant that it won’t let me sleep in past 6am. So here I am sat (a verb used very loosely) on the sofa watching Premier League highlights of games that I had genuinely forgotten were even going on yesterday with a large coffee and snuggled up under a blanket.

My kit bag lying abandoned in the middle of the floor and, as yet, still not unpacked. Every so often a get a strong whiff of something strange. Then I remember that is the Tiger Balm muscle rub that I currently have smothered all over my body. For a thirty-year-old who is not necessarily in the best shape of her life I don’t feel that bad…until I try to move anyway! But none of this matters it’s been an awesome week, so here’s how it went down.

 

Sunday 21^st Feb

Today is our last contact practice before we head off to Sapphire. Things have been ramped up and you can see the trepidation and anxiety in the girls’ eyes. Yet everything is coming together. Cuts are cleaner, catches completed where they were previously slipping through fingers, hits are harder and confidence is building. For me, so is the frustration. 6 weeks ago in my very first contact practice, I went over in a tackle and shredded my ankle. This hurts all the more as it has happened before. I had finally found a sport, and group of people, that I love and the opportunity to play was being snatched away from me. Over the past 6 weeks, I have pushed myself (probably too hard) and have taken part in as much practice as I can, but now I feel good. Rehab has been rapid but my ankle is strong. I know my coaches are protecting me by keeping me side-lined for so much of this final practice session but I can’t help feel helpless and woefully unprepared for what is to come next week. On the positive tilt of things, at least I know I am fully fit for six days’ time, even if I’m not quite sure what I’m letting myself in for!

Tuesday 23^rd Feb

School hall, final walk through. Plays are set. Nerves are ever present but excitement is building.

Friday 26^th Feb

Bag is packed, unpacked, checked, rechecked and repacked, and repeat. Anxiety is exhausting. Still awake at gone 1am and know that I have to be up at 6am. Plays are running endlessly through my head. Feet positon, hand position, adjustments. I know that no amount of mental rehearsal will prepare me for that first snap, block or tackle but it helps to calm the tension I can feel burning in my body. Sleep comes, eventually and fitfully.

Saturday 27^th Feb

6.00am

I wake up to the sounds of my alarm blaring and, for a second, I forget why it is insisting on yelling at me in such a tone at this time on a Saturday morning. Then it dawns on me. Today is Sapphire. No other motivation to get out of bed is needed despite the fuzzy head I have from lack of sleep. I don’t manage breakfast, too much chance of it making a repeat appearance. Meeting with the other girls and coaches, nerves and excitement are palpable and clearly visible in the eyes and mind of everyone there. Our very first competitive contact matches as Iceni Spears, for many of us our first ever competitive contact matches ever, for me included. The initial buzz slowly fades after the first half an hour and an anxious silence fills the bus. People deal with stress and anxiety in different ways. Inane chatter, isolating themselves with headphones in and music blaring, inappropriate jokes or sitting quietly with a very green clammy pallor trying not to puke. Our traditional breakfast stop at Maccy D’s and we’re on the road again. Next stop London.

11.30am

Preparing for a game in the dressing room with the rest of your team really opens your eyes to the people you play with. You get to know them on a whole new level. There is a lot of nakedness, laughter and tears although not strictly in that order. It’s fair to say that the nerves and excitement were evident in the slightly haphazard manner of our preparation. Knickers on inside out, jerseys being put on but pads forgotten, pads being put on back to front (for anyone who has experience of women’s ‘booby’ pads this is especially bizarre!) Even the coaches weren’t immune. The inevitable question of ‘where’s the ball?’ despite it being tucked under their arm, spoke volumes. Issues ironed out and it was nearly time to take to the field.

6.00pm

It’s fair to say that the last 5 or so hours have been a bit of a blur. Despite fighting the urge to puke at the side of the pitch I did manage to pull myself together enough to make the first snap of our first game against London Warriors. Nothing broke, it went as planned and my stomach contents stayed precisely where it was supposed to.

Snap, block, stop, huddle, reset. Suddenly, after days of frantic confusion and thought processes blazing through my brain, my mind was empty except for those simple steps. Snap, block, stop, huddle, reset. For a squad of 12 of whom for half it was our first ever match, playing Warriors was a baptism of fire. Facing a squad with nearly three times as many players and many years more experience was no mean feat. And we felt it. We were beaten, but we learnt. We were flattened, but we got back up. We lost, but we fought.

Every time I set foot on the pitch I was waiting for that first inevitable heavy hit. Blocking was one thing but being tackled and flattened by a rampaging herd of four London Warriors, that was quite another. It happened. Quick reception (I love making receptions in flag and don’t get to do nearly enough of it at Centre in contact for my liking) then turn and run. One Warrior, two, Warriors, three Warriors, four. Smash, bang, wallop and crunch – sounds a little like a new breakfast cereal. Several things went through my head. Keep hold of the ball.

Will my ankle hold up?

Don’t let go of the ball. What’s that ringing in my head?

Don’t bloody let go of the ball. Ouch that’s another elbow in the ribs. Where’s the ball?

Thankfully as I pulled myself together and found myself cushioned quite nicely in a pile of Warriors, as my coach had found earlier in the day, the ball was still under my arm. Relief. And giggles, much to the confusion of the opposition. It was great fun. Let’s do it again. Snap, block, receive, smash, get up, smile, huddle and reset.

My biggest regret from the first game is that we didn’t manage a score. It isn’t a true reflection of the work, dedication and passion poured into it by all the girls on our team. But we moved on. Game number two, barely 15 minutes later. Sandwell Steelers were a new challenge. Again a bigger and more experienced squad. We could have gone in with our heads down and passions dampened but it couldn’t have been further from the truth. Again we battled, fought, and gave it everything we had. It was a game we were always in and scores that were made gave everyone the lift we needed. I have to mention at this point what a pleasure Steelers were to play against. There is something incredible about a sport where you can be aggressively flattened by an opponent in the harshest way possible only to come to on the floor looking up at a smile and a friendly hand helping you up. Playing the game in the way we all want to, an absolute pleasure. Thank you girls. And thank you to Wembley Stallions for being such fabulous hosts.

Despite all the amazing positives from today, we found our 12-woman squad depleted by the final whistle. Three major injuries which will put players out of the next round in two weeks’ time. A quarter of our players down. An unavoidable risk in such a demanding and physical game. As we loaded the bus to return home, one player was already on her way to the hospital with a knee injury, another being carried onto the bus with a twisted ankle and another more than happily sucking on Entonox in the back of the medics’ ambulance – ready for a trip back to Norwich (via the obligatory KFC stop) and a late night visit to A&E. However exhausted, in pain and frustrated we might have been though, smiles, hugs and laughter abound. This is what’s it’s all about. The game we love with the people we love. And my first experience couldn’t have been much better.

At just gone 2am, I finally crawled into bed after returning from A&E and devouring doughnuts in a nice hot bath. Exhausted but proud. Bruised and elated.

Sunday 28^th Feb

So here I am finding myself becoming more and more supine on the sofa as the morning wears on. Nothing could have prepared me for everything that yesterday threw at me. But I know that come two weeks’ time when we take to the field for the next round in Portsmouth I’ll be there with a smile on my face, ready to do it all again with the people I am proud to call my teammates. Until then, my kit bag should probably be unpacked, no one likes a damn muddy clothes after they’ve been sat for three days! This week my bruises will fade and my muscles will return to their normal non-achy state but the joy and exhilaration of this experience will never fade. Now, where’s that hot water bottle?